Too young. Too fast.

The past few days passed in a whirl. From disbelief and unacceptance to finally a kind of resignation to forces we can never control. With the end, signifies the start of a new chapter.

As Clifton’s funeral draws to an end, the healing process for everyone, especially his close friends and family has only just began. Carrying on with life as per normal, yet knowing that someone important is missing and will never be back. That kind of unfathomable pain…

I don’t know Clifton well enough. We shared mutual friends and that was also how I got to know him. And now I regret not talking to him more even though I see him lots in school. I will always remember the jokes about this “big head”, his brotherly ways and his smile. Thinking back about his smile, seldom did I see him without one on his boyish face. The smile that brightens up the area and people around him.

Someone so passionate about life and so full of drive doesn’t deserve such an end. It pains me to even think about it… How did it happen? A young man who believes in himself and is out there fighting for the dream he has had since young. How did his body fail him when his mental strength and faith was so strong? Didn’t we all take to be that as long as we believed in ourselves, we could achieve anything? What happened to that?

Clifton’s passing on brought out in me and I think everyone else who knew him, an unwilling acknowledgment of how swift and sudden Death can be. Yet before we concede to the temptations of everlasting peace, we put up a resilient fight in trying to live a life to the fullest and embrace the emotions we should rightfully feel. Happiness, pain, love, heartache, empathy, anger…

We can never triumph Death, but we can live in harmony with it. In acceptance that Death is the inevitable end to every organism on Earth. In knowing that we have had a life well lived and gave our utmost best. In loving our family and friends and them loving you back. In appreciating the beauty and diversity around us. In being true to ourself and working to achieve what we want, despite knowing we might not succeed at all.

At Clifton’s funeral yesterday, when we walked behind his coffin into the crematorium hall, a soft breeze started blowing and the leaves started falling down… A touching scene embedded in my mind till now.

Clifton, albeit no longer physically on Earth, is still everywhere around us. In his brothers’ faces, in his parents’ loving ways, in his friends’ laughter, in the bustle of Orchard Road, in the stranger’s smile, in the falling leaves, in the sudden storms… Unforgotten, a surreal existence in which his friends continue their affinity with him.

Clifton, you’ll be greatly missed. Thank you for the friendships you have forged, for the support, love and encouragement you gave to everyone. As we close your chapter on Earth and begin anew, you also have started your new life in paradise. In an unknown world without pain, grief or evil. Only eternal peace and joy.

May you soar. Just as you did on Earth.